in celebration of trying new things, i ate some corn chowder with crab meat in it. see, i'm not on any special diets. about as special as i get in the realm of food is not liking chocolate or olives. or seafood for the most part, but i'm willing to stretch my palate on occasion. the chowder wasn't bad.
this place is full of special diets. it makes me want to laugh how many things people won't eat around here. after many years of picking on my "pansy food" friends i still love them and respect their choice not to eat this or that kind of meat, or even the ones who don't eat any meat at all. i jest because i love, but hey there, let's not let this thing devolve into the land of fruitarian bullshit.
by the way, do fruitarians really exist or is that just some urban myth? poor little murdered carrots. wait - i did have a point somewhere in there, didn't i?
my only dietary need from now on is going to be that i don't eat health food. i love to eat healthy food, as in food that is good for me, but this foofy health food crap makes me want to vomit in my own mouth. these people were obviously never subjected to the test kitchen of "first house on the block with a juicer" or the world of chalky protein shakes. if they had been then they would just back off and get some variety.
p.s. vegan bread is shitty and feels like cheap sloppy play-doh. you just can't have a lump of random stuff and decide to call it bread. it isn't bread. it's something resembling food byproduct poop. sorry to all of you out there crying a river for your special little diet but i have to defend the honor of bread. don't forsake the goodness of the goods. if i gave up smoking you wouldn't catch me running around with candy cigarettes in my mouth pretending to be a smoker just to fit in. stop pretending to be a lover of the goods. save the sanctity of the baked goods!!!
if you don't like a food, don't eat it. if you try it once in a while just to see if you do like it i'm not going to chastise you for straying from your sworn oath of fruitarianism. if you can adapt into a lifestyle that will allow you to still venture out into the world without avoiding everything that out there for fear of encountering something offensive on a plate that isn't even yours, that's fabulous. in return i promise not to offer you a cheeseburger from the grill. i might even let you pick the restaurant. otherwise, just stay home and eat your astronaut food in your john travolta bubble.
clothing on a dent and damage farewell tour:
a worn out pair of black jeans
several socks - r.i.p.
pantsies with holes
4 comments:
I believe there are actually fruitarians out there. More power to 'em, but I couldn't do it, "pansy" that I am.
And I'm so tired of the war on bread. Bread is yummy! I love bread. A nice crusty sourdough, spread with a little butter (yes, I said butter, get away from me with your "spreads")...nothing better.
and she's a butter purist to boot! yes the crust is what i live for on a lot of breads. damn, now i want some rolls in the worst way.
vegan bread is a joke. Hellz, vegan anything is terrible.
In my year of vegetarian, I still won't touch vegan food, if I can help it.
In fact, a few months ago, I bought a frozen dinner thingy from Whole foods that was vegetarian lasagne. Or so I thought. It was actually vegan lasagne, which caused me to pout quite openly. Whaddya mean there's no CHEESE on it?!?!?
I got your package. It made me smile. You will get a package, but I may shake it up a bit by sending it in January. :D
i'm just glad to hear from you! mary and i were getting a little worried since you sounded down in your posting. i'll keep deluging you with mail no matter what, but keep that one eye out for your january package.
lasagne with no cheese?!? who the fuck thought that idea would go over well? makes me want to gag just thinking about it.
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