get off thy butt, huh?

a few things i did this weekend that i did not do at all last weekend:
get dressed each morning
read a book
leave the house
socialize with people, in person
feed my creative urges
brush my hair

it was kind of a lowly week. in spite of getting the news that mary is coming to seattle, i was still inexplicably being a bit of a bummer. it did hit me that i should try doing something besides my mute staring at the wall, so we got out to see sights and be fabulous. i'm almost cheerful today. yes, i know. it really is a scary thought.

most of the time that i feel pathetic is becuse i'm hell bent on feeling pathetic and getting stuck in it until i'm all mucky with blechiness. though that might sound so very obvious, it's an elusive mystery when i'm in the middle of staring. (and i don't mean the good kind of staring, zhen. i mean the pitifully ho hum, breathe a heavy sigh now and then while slouching painfully sort.) even when i don't want to leave the house, i should peel myself from the floor and get out. even for a minute or two. even just to take out the trash. if nothing else, i can be adding steps to my new pedometer.

anyhooo, the scupture park downtown had a big to-do this weekend for its opening. we walked around the park with some of derek's "home school" people for a couple of hours and had a nice brunch afterwards. it was pretty clear and sunny so we decided it would be a good idea to enjoy the weather. there was a nice balance between the sun on my back and the cold breezes coming off the water. while the sculptures were a bit of hit and miss, the walk turned out to be enjoyable.

bonnie and kelly took us out to breakfast this morning at a great place with real chicken fried steak. who knew a plate full of grease and flour could turn out to be such a delicacy? the morning was also nice just because we got around to a different part of town and found a few new things. we haven't been as keen on exploring new parts of seattle as we should be lately. hopefully i can explore even more once mary gets here.

and ooooooh, you'll be so proud of me. i made plans with a girl from work - this involved having a new person in my new house, which scares the shit out of me these days - and then actually followed up on them without turning chicken. she came over and we watched some foamy the squirrel cartoons. we had coffee and even sat around gluing things together. we made posties and stuff! she had a great appreciation for my adhesive collection and almost purred when i showed off my many colors of sharpies. this could be someone who will actually come over again. and i can't wait to see how those bottle cap creations turn out over the next day or two.

maybe i'm just trying to gear up for being around mary again. it's been so long since i've been able to just hang out with one of my long-lost peeps. yes, there is derek, but i swear he needs a break from being the only one to get me. it'll be nice to be around someone who makes me feel completely at ease, someone who needs no explanation or apology for my shoddy behaviour. (mary, i will still apologize anyway whne i'm being a total loser. really. i promise. no, i mean it!) i have a couple of people here who don't make me feel self-conscious, but she's had a lot more time to understand and be totally unfazed. she also makes the same squeaky noise when we spot something cute at the same time. EEE!

things i did not do this weekend that i was supposed to do:
go to target
mail a certain long letter
clean the bathroom
practice playing my keyboard

hey, sorry. there is only so much a girl can get done and still make time to do the good kind of staring. what the hell did you expect? a total reform? pffft.


songs that choke me up every time:
one
here comes the sun
don't dream it's over
creep
the other end of the telescope
every time we say goodbye