random side notes - chapter twenty eight

would it be wrong of me to go to the store in the middle of the night simply for deodorant, magazines, and chick-o-sticks? it's a case that makes one question, "why did she really come here?" shopping under cover of darkness is the best. let's hope the drugstore isn't a last resort for people who procrastinate during the holidays, because i just need the aforementioned essentials.

as far as the rest of the week, life makes me indecisive as to where i should begin. mary's package for someone else finally arrived. i may have gotten someone a piece of furniture they truly need. moleskins were so cheap that we had to clear the bookstore out in a frenzy. there was some sort of news about a stabbing today. someone made cookies for derek, via my friendship with them. checking in for my flight was easy, but finding the rest of the paperwork i need isn't going well. i remembered to take my pill in a timely manner every single day. karen gave me a new bag filled with handmade and sanrio goodies. my thumbs feel funky.

next week i might start thinking about resolutions. once again, i'll be saving the really hard shit for lent so that there'll be a light in the tunnel. thank you, but i prefer to have my resolutions be something i can actually achieve without wigging out and having that (extra) cookie. there is only so much food i can ingest to make my inappropriate guilt go away without feeling all bloaty and stuff.

duuuuude, i am filling up this computer with bullshit already. what the...?!?! my startup disk must be on some kind of diet. there is no way i've accumulated this much useless data in this short of a time. does anyone else know what's on your computers?

it really sucks when you burp and it tastes like throwup. burps should give you a pleasant memory of meals gone by, not torture you with yucky and force you to make weird faces. that is so unfair, like even worse than when you burp after drinking soda and it goes up and burns the inside of your nostrils. ouch, those totally sting.

what to pack. what to pack. does anyone else make a checklist for vacations?

fattie mcpudge needs to lose a little weight up in here. not that much, but enough to get back that "eating pants" feeling in a few of her clothes. scales lie. photographs lie. even your friends might accidentally lie when their allergies don't let them see straight. pants don't lie. new pants are brutally honest and like to remind your wallet that you need to put down that (extra) cookie or else that night spent with jacked-up static hair while sweating under mean florescent lighting in the fitting room was all a big waste. it should only take a few months to gain that smidge o' pizza give back in the belt again.

sometimes i wonder what derek does in the house while i'm gone. my gut tells me he either slinks around like a sloth or does things i don't wanna know about later. in either case, he deserves to have some babble-free time to relax and study and bond with the cats. my company is entertaining, surely, but not without its hardships.

for all those times i've bragged about never having to do the laundry in my house, let me tell you this - i just officially helped fold all bazillion tons of clothes. i am a helper, damnit.


please tell me you relate:
my elbows are ashy
popcorn makes me kinda gassy
i heart people's scars
toenails suck